The Ways of the Stars...

Aries
You: What time is it?
Person: Shut the hell up!

Taurus
You: What time is it?
Person: What the fuck are you talking about? You're wearing four watches on your arm!

Gemini
You: What time is it?
Person: Huh? We're in the middle of having sex here, you're asking what time it is?

Cancer
You: What time is it?
Person: Shut the hell up!

Leo
You: What time is it?
Person: Try to remember to pay attention to the small details in all matters or you could really end up tripping yourself up.

Virgo
You: What time is it?
Person: Mom! I'm taking a shower, let go of the curtain!

Libra
You: What time is it?
Person: You are drooling. Seriously: stop it.

Scorpio
You: What time is it?
Person: 12:15

Sagittarius
You: What time is it?
Person: Please pull your pants up, we're in a supermarket, dude.

Capricorn
You: What time is it?
Person: Uhhh, we're in outer space, man.

Aquarius
You: What time is it?
Person: Eat a dick!

Pisces
You: What time is it?
Person: Time for you to get close to Jesus. I've got this shotgun filled with 16 thin dimes. I'm gonna spread you apart like a crazy woman's quilt. Get on your knees!

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