Wednesday, June 7, 2000. Approx. 9pm. Pine and Steiner. Very young woman tries to make left hand turn from right of three lanes on the one way street known as Pine. She turns into guy in grey SUV in middle lane. He turns into me in left lane. I go down. He goes into the traffic signal.

Scene 2: Fire engine, ambulance, cops, paramedics. My right foot swollen badly. Small cut on right hand. Bruise on right hip. Thinks name is Tommy.

What's most important is that no one is (very badly) hurt. What's next most important is that I am not at fault. Actually, no, that is most important, then that no one is hurt. And hopefully the girl has insurance to buy me a new bike.

It was weird, I never really thought I was going to die, or even be seriously injured, as the accident was happening. I remember the accident. The whole time hoping that nothing at all serious would happen. Like, "Oh, I'll get up and pick up my bike and ride on." Didn't happen. The SUV turned into me and I tried to swerve and brake and turn, but it was already touching me. So, I laid the bike down and went flying into the gutter. The tow truck had to lift his car up to drag my bike out from underneath it afterwards.

Actually, I said I remember the accident. I remember parts. I mean I know that I went down and somehow ended up in the gutter. I feel like at some point I tried to get away from my bike. But I don't remember hearing the guy wrap the entire front of his car around the post. And I don't know how much time there was between when I went down and when I got up.

I was surprisingly calm, not that I'm trying to brag. The girl was hysterical, asking me and the other guy if we were okay. He was a bit shaken, and shaking. The airbag saved him from a worse fate, I think. After a few minutes I saw that my hand was covered in blood. But I knew that it couldn't be serious, because I'd have noticed before then. It was just a small, but deep cut on my hand. I was mainly concerned with not getting the blood on my clothes. What's really bad is that the weekend before, in LA, I had bought some Diesel jeans. $119. Sadly, the back right pocket was ripped through at the bottom. That was where I had put bike lock. The lock must have caused the jeans to rip against something. Pavement I guess. Sort of ruined my new jeans.

My Honda is "parked" at the corner of Steiner and Pine now. I'll have to have someone tow it tomorrow. I'll have to call the insurance. But what affected me the most was that sense of loneliness. Although a very dear friend picked me up, I had to limp into my apartment all by myself. And nobody was coming over. Silence. Darkness. No lover. No one to hold me. And be scared and relieved.

So, I iced my foot, elevated it, read a book. In the old days I would have gotten drunk. But in the old days I got drunk every night, so it was nothing special.

Love,

Tommy.

Postscript from April 26, 2004... The young woman had minimum insurance. Her fucking lame-ass (apparently I'm still bitter) insurance company would only give $5000 to split between my brand new $7000 bike and the guy's relatively new SUV -- both totalled. I only had minimum insurance as well -- so my insurance wouldn't pay anything either. I could have taken the woman to small claims court and gotten the limit of $5000. But, she reportedly had no money to speak of. So after a year + I just took the $1800 her insurance company offered. So lame and annoying. By the way, I now have more insurance coverage.